Sunday Feb 15th Viewing at Costello-Runyon Funeral Home
2-4pm and 7-9pm
568 Middlesex Avenue (Route 27)
Metuchen, New Jersey 08840
732-548-0149 Toll Free 800-522-0149
Funeral Mass at Saint Helenas RC Church
Monday Feb 16th at 9:30am
Grove Avenue
Edison NJ
Burial at Saint Gertrude Cemetary
Inman Avenue Colonia NJ following mass
Repass (lunch after burial)
Metuchen Elks Lodge (around 12noon or so)
All friends and family welcome
Saturday, February 14, 2009
Friday, February 13, 2009
Saddest Day of my life
Chris had so many of his favorite people with him last night...
His dad and brothers.. my parents and brother and our best friends...
Everyone left little by little as it got later last night...
I spent the night with Chris.. it was the worst night of my life but at the same time, I feel so blessed I was there...
I watched as his heart rate got faster and his breathing more difficult... and I sat with him holding his hand and rubbing his arms and face.... he had a short while of more troubled breathing... during the last 60-90 minutes, his eyes were open and he looked in my direction... I got a slight moan from him while I was speaking to him.. I sang our song to him (he knew I couldnt sing.. maybe he was laughing)... "My Best Friend" by Tim McGraw...
At around 5:15am, Chris left us to spend eternity with the angels... I watched as he finally stopped suffering... He finally looked peaceful....
Today, I lost my best friend... the man I was supposed to spend the rest of my life with and have a family with... He treated me like such a princess... even in his worst days, he worried about me... worried about if my back hurt from sleeping on the couch... and I enjoyed every minute of the time I had with him... God introduced me to him for a reason... And I cannot change the fact that I wanted him forever and did not get my request....
I miss him already and even though I know he is finally not suffering... I wanted a miracle and its going to take me some time to have this sink in... It is much easier to know that this was supposed to happen than it is for my heart to be ok with it...
Dana said I will have quite an awesome angel looking over me forever... I said "I better behave" and she told me "nah, have some fun.. keep him busy" and I think she is right... It will help knowing Chris is with me no matter what I am doing
Well, now that I am balling... I will sign off...
Thank you for reading my novels.. I think I will find a way to continue this blog for Chris....
xoxox talk to you all later
Jenn (& Chris from heaven)
His dad and brothers.. my parents and brother and our best friends...
Everyone left little by little as it got later last night...
I spent the night with Chris.. it was the worst night of my life but at the same time, I feel so blessed I was there...
I watched as his heart rate got faster and his breathing more difficult... and I sat with him holding his hand and rubbing his arms and face.... he had a short while of more troubled breathing... during the last 60-90 minutes, his eyes were open and he looked in my direction... I got a slight moan from him while I was speaking to him.. I sang our song to him (he knew I couldnt sing.. maybe he was laughing)... "My Best Friend" by Tim McGraw...
At around 5:15am, Chris left us to spend eternity with the angels... I watched as he finally stopped suffering... He finally looked peaceful....
Today, I lost my best friend... the man I was supposed to spend the rest of my life with and have a family with... He treated me like such a princess... even in his worst days, he worried about me... worried about if my back hurt from sleeping on the couch... and I enjoyed every minute of the time I had with him... God introduced me to him for a reason... And I cannot change the fact that I wanted him forever and did not get my request....
I miss him already and even though I know he is finally not suffering... I wanted a miracle and its going to take me some time to have this sink in... It is much easier to know that this was supposed to happen than it is for my heart to be ok with it...
Dana said I will have quite an awesome angel looking over me forever... I said "I better behave" and she told me "nah, have some fun.. keep him busy" and I think she is right... It will help knowing Chris is with me no matter what I am doing
Well, now that I am balling... I will sign off...
Thank you for reading my novels.. I think I will find a way to continue this blog for Chris....
xoxox talk to you all later
Jenn (& Chris from heaven)
Thursday, February 12, 2009
Still Hanging
The doctors think Chris's fast shallow breathing is very indicative of whats happening...
They think he might not make it thru the day
Palliative Doctors are involved (similar to hospice)
Chaplain Sharon is still our chaplain thank goodness
Chris's brother Lew and sister in law Jen flew up from FLorida (air force) yesterday and Jeanie, Christine, Christine, mom, dad, Pop Wax, Tommy and Danny and Ronnie and Gary have been here thru the day... Most are still here... my brother just got here
Haleigh came to see Chris.. and Dylan.. so young.. but they came up from DE and Chris opened his eyes when we said Haleigh (5 yrs old) was here... awwww Chris loved her and Dylan so much
Now we are just waiting to see how he does
He would be so happy to know they are planning on moving him to bone marrow unit
They think he might not make it thru the day
Palliative Doctors are involved (similar to hospice)
Chaplain Sharon is still our chaplain thank goodness
Chris's brother Lew and sister in law Jen flew up from FLorida (air force) yesterday and Jeanie, Christine, Christine, mom, dad, Pop Wax, Tommy and Danny and Ronnie and Gary have been here thru the day... Most are still here... my brother just got here
Haleigh came to see Chris.. and Dylan.. so young.. but they came up from DE and Chris opened his eyes when we said Haleigh (5 yrs old) was here... awwww Chris loved her and Dylan so much
Now we are just waiting to see how he does
He would be so happy to know they are planning on moving him to bone marrow unit
Tuesday, February 10, 2009
Bad News- Chris is not going to get better
I am not going to get into much detail...
Chris's body is not fighting anymore :(
I went to see him at lunch today and the doctors called me into the lounge....
Thank God my personal angel, Chaplain Sharon was there at the same time... She came with us... Dr Aisner, Anne, and the kidney doctor told me that Chris's chemistries are all out of whack...
His kidneys are shutting down... one arm is cold... they basically said the infections and fungus have cut off blood vessels.. i am totally gonna get this wrong medically... sooo besically his organs are shutting down slowly..
They told me he is in a lot of pain and think its cruel to revive him if he bottoms out.... I am in a state of shock
THey think he has a few days to live
My best friends and mom ran here ASAP
And Sharon called Chris's dad for me... Him and the waxmonsky brothers came next...
Thank goodness for my best friends (Jeanie, Christine and Christine) Chris always told me what amazing friends i have and he is so right..
It breaks my heart to see my Chris like this and to see my mom and everyone so sad...
I keep leaking but Chris said I leak all the time... nothing has changed...
Thanks Adriana for coming with food for me.. and my brother is the best brother in the world...
I am sure I will add more when I can....
thanks everyone for being there for me and us...
xoxox Jenn :(
Chris's body is not fighting anymore :(
I went to see him at lunch today and the doctors called me into the lounge....
Thank God my personal angel, Chaplain Sharon was there at the same time... She came with us... Dr Aisner, Anne, and the kidney doctor told me that Chris's chemistries are all out of whack...
His kidneys are shutting down... one arm is cold... they basically said the infections and fungus have cut off blood vessels.. i am totally gonna get this wrong medically... sooo besically his organs are shutting down slowly..
They told me he is in a lot of pain and think its cruel to revive him if he bottoms out.... I am in a state of shock
THey think he has a few days to live
My best friends and mom ran here ASAP
And Sharon called Chris's dad for me... Him and the waxmonsky brothers came next...
Thank goodness for my best friends (Jeanie, Christine and Christine) Chris always told me what amazing friends i have and he is so right..
It breaks my heart to see my Chris like this and to see my mom and everyone so sad...
I keep leaking but Chris said I leak all the time... nothing has changed...
Thanks Adriana for coming with food for me.. and my brother is the best brother in the world...
I am sure I will add more when I can....
thanks everyone for being there for me and us...
xoxox Jenn :(
Sunday, February 8, 2009
Infection - Time to Fight
Quick update
Doctors told me that they found a fungus on the intestines that they removed during surgery
They put him on anti-fungal meds (different ones than he was on for a long time)
Its a very very tough fungus to get rid of
His immune system is suppressed .. have to continue doing so at least a little bit for the graft vs host
Chris has been "awake" but does not remember the week. He is very uncomfortable
We tell him he had surgery.. but I dont think he gets it completely
Nurses from bone marrow visit him here and there... his dad and my dad were there Friday. His dad and brothers are coming back today
My mom and bro kept me company yesterday...
Yesterday, at one point he woke up and asked me to bring $50 to chuch
Considering he doesnt say much, i thought that i should do that.
So I went to mass this morning...
Christine Rabbath actually talked me into it. I assumed God would accept $5 since we are broke, but Christine said to do it and she would pay me back. I thought about it, and I realized I had to do it. I have no idea what chris was thinking about or what might have been revealed to him but I thank Christine for that
Today, the gospel was from Mark 1: 29-39 - It was about healing people who had diseases
I would like to think that was God telling us to hang in there... we will see
Chris has the odds stacked against him now and we need prayers. Chris is struggling with just being confined and confused. He needs strength and healing
Off to the hospital.. talk to you all later
xoxox
Doctors told me that they found a fungus on the intestines that they removed during surgery
They put him on anti-fungal meds (different ones than he was on for a long time)
Its a very very tough fungus to get rid of
His immune system is suppressed .. have to continue doing so at least a little bit for the graft vs host
Chris has been "awake" but does not remember the week. He is very uncomfortable
We tell him he had surgery.. but I dont think he gets it completely
Nurses from bone marrow visit him here and there... his dad and my dad were there Friday. His dad and brothers are coming back today
My mom and bro kept me company yesterday...
Yesterday, at one point he woke up and asked me to bring $50 to chuch
Considering he doesnt say much, i thought that i should do that.
So I went to mass this morning...
Christine Rabbath actually talked me into it. I assumed God would accept $5 since we are broke, but Christine said to do it and she would pay me back. I thought about it, and I realized I had to do it. I have no idea what chris was thinking about or what might have been revealed to him but I thank Christine for that
Today, the gospel was from Mark 1: 29-39 - It was about healing people who had diseases
I would like to think that was God telling us to hang in there... we will see
Chris has the odds stacked against him now and we need prayers. Chris is struggling with just being confined and confused. He needs strength and healing
Off to the hospital.. talk to you all later
xoxox
Friday, February 6, 2009
Worst Week Since Diagnosis- 2 Surgeries
Sorry I have not blogged in 5 days. It has been a terrible week
But because I have been running between work, home, and hospital and have had good company at the hospital, I have not had a chance to update...
Basically, Chris seemed ok Monday night. Jeanie and I visited with him in ICU
They were going to be taking him to catscan at night... but he was having trouble keeping the clear drink down
I was not too too worried because they saw no air getting thru on the xray 2 days prior
But, Monday night at midnight, I got a call from a surgeon... There was a hole in Chris's colon and they needed to go in and do emergency surgery
That was the worst phone call. Jeanie had just gone home, so I called her back and she took a ride there to meet me and wait with me
On my drive to the hospital, I called Chris's dad, his brothers, his Aunt Ro & uncle Les, Ronnie/Gary, and I texted Chaplain Sharon
I only reached Matt, who also tried to call dad, but couldnt reach him... I also talked to Uncle Les and ROnnie, but they are in Maryland and Delaware
Chris was so sleepy from being so sick (ovbiously with a hole in his belly)
We told him what was happening but he would fall asleep or mumble that he loved me or say he was a mess but that he would get thru it...
He would wake once in a while and say "whats going on?" Awww poor guy
My heart was breaking... I couldnt keep my tears in.. luckily, i leak often, and Chris always tells me to stop leaking so I just made it like my typical emotional state and told him that he had to get better so we could plan our wedding.. He said "sounds like a plan" -- He always said "Go big or go home" and well, this is big..... Sharon always said it has to get worse before it gets better
But I could have never prepared myself for this
Then Chris said "I have a feeling you know more than me" More heart breaking.. I said "Chris, remember in November when you had no hole in your colon and you sang a little song 'Theres no hole in my colon dear jenny dear jenny'"? HE said yes.. I said "well now you do have one, and they have to just go in and fix it.. all you have to do is hang in there and get thru this" He was asleep again shortly after...
Luckily, we knew the surgeon from previous times they got surgery on board "in case"
He explained that this was very serious. Its not a very complicated surgery normally, but because he is already sick and they cannot know what the Graft Vs Host is going to continue to be like.. and because they know his immune system is suppressed, he will heal so much lower and we have to pray that he can heal and avoid infection.... Dr Gannon was the surgeon and he was very honest with me, but he said he wouldnt do this if he didnt have some hope
He also said he doesnt like to operate on people in Chris' condition unless its urgent and he cannot live with a hole in his colon.. waiting another 24-48 hours could be much worse
Surgery lasted 2 hours max. They did not close him up because he wanted to go back in after a day or 2 to see if there was more small intestine to take and also close him up with colostomy bags... Chris was stable and sedated... Since he is intubated, they have his arms tied down so he doesnt pull anything out
At 530am , i went home to nap.. I didnt nap much but Rex knew i was sad and layed right against me the whole time
Tommy and dad called me back. They came to visit on Tuesday. Chris knows when you are there but he cannot talk cus he is sedated...
Aunt Ro called and she visited Wednesday and saw him all day before the 2nd surgery
The 2nd surgery went fine. They took out another 7 cm of small intestine.
Christine Rabbath came to wait with me and Ben and my mom while he was in 2nd surgery Wednesday afternoon
Chris has been stable (blood pressure, temp, heart rate, etc) since all of this...
He is swollen and retaining a lot of water but its common from surgery.. they did not want to give him meds to get rid of water yesterday because it was too soon after surgery
Hopefully they will do that today and they will be able to take the tube out of throat soon... He is breathing about the oxygen they are giving him.. that is good
He wakes a bit here and there and he knows we are there and he sometimes gets a little excited.. but he is bothered by the tube obviously
My dad visited during the day a bit so he has been getting company
THe bone marrrow nurses also went down to see him
TOday, his dad is visiting and I think my dad might be going back too
Whenever they take the tube out and he is awake enough, he will learn about his colostomy bags :( I am dreading that.
If he fully recovers, they will be able to remove those and go back in to fix him right
He has a tough challenage, but i have faith.. Chris can beat this. He has beat the odds so far. Its hard to heal in his condition and he is sooo strong
I am told that the nurses see people like him (different complications, but all bad) and they think they are not gonna make it and they do.. and chris is stronger than most people... we just need a lot of prayers
There are more details to write but I will leave it at that for now..
xoxxo jenn
But because I have been running between work, home, and hospital and have had good company at the hospital, I have not had a chance to update...
Basically, Chris seemed ok Monday night. Jeanie and I visited with him in ICU
They were going to be taking him to catscan at night... but he was having trouble keeping the clear drink down
I was not too too worried because they saw no air getting thru on the xray 2 days prior
But, Monday night at midnight, I got a call from a surgeon... There was a hole in Chris's colon and they needed to go in and do emergency surgery
That was the worst phone call. Jeanie had just gone home, so I called her back and she took a ride there to meet me and wait with me
On my drive to the hospital, I called Chris's dad, his brothers, his Aunt Ro & uncle Les, Ronnie/Gary, and I texted Chaplain Sharon
I only reached Matt, who also tried to call dad, but couldnt reach him... I also talked to Uncle Les and ROnnie, but they are in Maryland and Delaware
Chris was so sleepy from being so sick (ovbiously with a hole in his belly)
We told him what was happening but he would fall asleep or mumble that he loved me or say he was a mess but that he would get thru it...
He would wake once in a while and say "whats going on?" Awww poor guy
My heart was breaking... I couldnt keep my tears in.. luckily, i leak often, and Chris always tells me to stop leaking so I just made it like my typical emotional state and told him that he had to get better so we could plan our wedding.. He said "sounds like a plan" -- He always said "Go big or go home" and well, this is big..... Sharon always said it has to get worse before it gets better
But I could have never prepared myself for this
Then Chris said "I have a feeling you know more than me" More heart breaking.. I said "Chris, remember in November when you had no hole in your colon and you sang a little song 'Theres no hole in my colon dear jenny dear jenny'"? HE said yes.. I said "well now you do have one, and they have to just go in and fix it.. all you have to do is hang in there and get thru this" He was asleep again shortly after...
Luckily, we knew the surgeon from previous times they got surgery on board "in case"
He explained that this was very serious. Its not a very complicated surgery normally, but because he is already sick and they cannot know what the Graft Vs Host is going to continue to be like.. and because they know his immune system is suppressed, he will heal so much lower and we have to pray that he can heal and avoid infection.... Dr Gannon was the surgeon and he was very honest with me, but he said he wouldnt do this if he didnt have some hope
He also said he doesnt like to operate on people in Chris' condition unless its urgent and he cannot live with a hole in his colon.. waiting another 24-48 hours could be much worse
Surgery lasted 2 hours max. They did not close him up because he wanted to go back in after a day or 2 to see if there was more small intestine to take and also close him up with colostomy bags... Chris was stable and sedated... Since he is intubated, they have his arms tied down so he doesnt pull anything out
At 530am , i went home to nap.. I didnt nap much but Rex knew i was sad and layed right against me the whole time
Tommy and dad called me back. They came to visit on Tuesday. Chris knows when you are there but he cannot talk cus he is sedated...
Aunt Ro called and she visited Wednesday and saw him all day before the 2nd surgery
The 2nd surgery went fine. They took out another 7 cm of small intestine.
Christine Rabbath came to wait with me and Ben and my mom while he was in 2nd surgery Wednesday afternoon
Chris has been stable (blood pressure, temp, heart rate, etc) since all of this...
He is swollen and retaining a lot of water but its common from surgery.. they did not want to give him meds to get rid of water yesterday because it was too soon after surgery
Hopefully they will do that today and they will be able to take the tube out of throat soon... He is breathing about the oxygen they are giving him.. that is good
He wakes a bit here and there and he knows we are there and he sometimes gets a little excited.. but he is bothered by the tube obviously
My dad visited during the day a bit so he has been getting company
THe bone marrrow nurses also went down to see him
TOday, his dad is visiting and I think my dad might be going back too
Whenever they take the tube out and he is awake enough, he will learn about his colostomy bags :( I am dreading that.
If he fully recovers, they will be able to remove those and go back in to fix him right
He has a tough challenage, but i have faith.. Chris can beat this. He has beat the odds so far. Its hard to heal in his condition and he is sooo strong
I am told that the nurses see people like him (different complications, but all bad) and they think they are not gonna make it and they do.. and chris is stronger than most people... we just need a lot of prayers
There are more details to write but I will leave it at that for now..
xoxxo jenn
Sunday, February 1, 2009
Back in ICU... Quick Update
Well...
This morning I woke up at 630am to 3 missed calls from Bone Marrow Nurses Desk
I called back right away and Sophie had been calling to let me know they were moving him down to ICU
Apparently his blood pressure was a little low overnight and although she had him stable, and his fever had broken, I guess the ICU docs felt it was best to move him
Sophie was saying she hoped the oncologists (Strair or Aisner)would come in before they moved him.. but i called Dr Strair and left a message explaining what was going on...
They told me they packed up his stuff and were holding his cell and computer til i got there.. that was nice.. i usually have to pack him up and move it all and then wait an hour while they get him settled in ICU
Anyways, my dad followed me to the hospital and took his stuff home... I went to ICU and saw Chris... His nurse Sara was wonderful.. very compassionate and explained a lot to me.. very friendly.. Chris slept most of the time..
The infectious disease doctors are on board, as are the intensivists (pulmonary), surgeons again in case, and others...
Basically, they want to closely monitor him
apparently, yesterday, they only took blood from his picc line.. not from a vein.. they always take from both
No one told me yesterday that they couldnt get a vein...
So, they havent officially ruled out the possibility that his picc line is infected.. but because his bellyrubin is high (indicates gall bladder, or liver area) and because he has increased belly cramps and tenderness... the doctors are thinking his infection came from the gall bladder
As we know, the GI Tract is a common place that gets attacked with all his treatments... and he has the GVHD there... but also they said sludge could accumulate there and cause some blockage or inflammation..
They are doing an ultrasound ... as of 7pm tonight they had not yet.. so probably in the morning (monday morning feb 2nd). They will see if the gall bladder looks very inflammed or not
They are also attempting to get blood from a vein (i told Sara to try the hands because thats where they usually get it)
They have taken more blood from the picc...
His fever all day today was 96 to 98 so that is good... antibiotics might be working
Chris had no poop all day.. so when i left tonight at 7-ish, it had been almost 24 hours
Not sure if i should get excited because i dont know if a gall bladder infection would stop poop... i think since the stomach is connected to the intestines and whatnot that he would still poop if he has inflammation in the bowels.. but i am not a doctor, obviously... just trying to see some bright side...
anyways, his blood pressure was good all day.. they have him on dopamine.. but its still good that they had him stablized ...
So, there went our little bone marrow unit, 4th floor, JennChris party for the superbowl... postponed! :(
I am happy he was not on ativan.. but he slept... but if all that is going on in his belly, his body needs to rest...
I decided to leave .. actually i think i left at 630... i watched Faith hill and jennifer Hudson and left shortly after. they kick you out of ICU at 7pm for an hour (shift change) and figured since he was sleeping, and i wanted to get rest and watch the game, that i would just go home.. I will stop there in the morning before work
I asked Dr Hart (Infectious Disease doctor who i have known since june whenever chris had infections) about what they would do and he doesnt think surgery would be an option now... and the xray shows no punctures or holes... so they could put a tube to gallbladder to drain the crap out that is infected..
But who knows yet... it could be just meds.. or something else
Chris would open his eyes and smile when i talked and answer when i asked him stuff.. but he wants to sleep.. he is pretty miserable but smiled and agreed when i told him to hang in there...
He said something about still fighting "for us" - poor guy has been through hell.. and back... and back to hell...
Its amazing how fast this happened... He asked me on friday night to bring his laptop on saturday and when i got there satutrday he already had a 102.3 fever
Dr Hart talked to me about what i already figured, but i wanted clarification... he provides the antibiotics orders and management and he hopes to be given as best an immune system as possible.. but with his kind of GVHD, the oncologists do not want to stop the immunosuppresents so we just hope that the meds work with his suppresed immune system
He got platelets and red blood today. His white cell count was a little higher than yesterday.. it was 2.9... 4-10 is normal. Under 2 is neutropenic..
Dr Aisner is on for February.. I asked him that today... so atleast there will be someone there i like for a while.. i was worried about who february might be
When i got to ICU today, i ran into a resident i know from november or october and she is in ICU now... she is so sweet and chats whenever i see her.. i think she liked me and chris... makes me feel more comfy when i can talk to doctors i have gotten to know
i am not happy that the steelers won.. but i am more sad that chris missed yet another "holiday" - it was a good game though
Well, its Feb 1st.. 2 full months since he was admitted for transplant...
He has been in the hospital for about 95 of the last 104 days or so
I never imagined he would still be in the hospital or going back to ICU this far into transplant... But I trust God will get us thru this additional ICU trip & infection...
Please keep him in your prayers
i will update more tomorrow
xoxox Jenn
This morning I woke up at 630am to 3 missed calls from Bone Marrow Nurses Desk
I called back right away and Sophie had been calling to let me know they were moving him down to ICU
Apparently his blood pressure was a little low overnight and although she had him stable, and his fever had broken, I guess the ICU docs felt it was best to move him
Sophie was saying she hoped the oncologists (Strair or Aisner)would come in before they moved him.. but i called Dr Strair and left a message explaining what was going on...
They told me they packed up his stuff and were holding his cell and computer til i got there.. that was nice.. i usually have to pack him up and move it all and then wait an hour while they get him settled in ICU
Anyways, my dad followed me to the hospital and took his stuff home... I went to ICU and saw Chris... His nurse Sara was wonderful.. very compassionate and explained a lot to me.. very friendly.. Chris slept most of the time..
The infectious disease doctors are on board, as are the intensivists (pulmonary), surgeons again in case, and others...
Basically, they want to closely monitor him
apparently, yesterday, they only took blood from his picc line.. not from a vein.. they always take from both
No one told me yesterday that they couldnt get a vein...
So, they havent officially ruled out the possibility that his picc line is infected.. but because his bellyrubin is high (indicates gall bladder, or liver area) and because he has increased belly cramps and tenderness... the doctors are thinking his infection came from the gall bladder
As we know, the GI Tract is a common place that gets attacked with all his treatments... and he has the GVHD there... but also they said sludge could accumulate there and cause some blockage or inflammation..
They are doing an ultrasound ... as of 7pm tonight they had not yet.. so probably in the morning (monday morning feb 2nd). They will see if the gall bladder looks very inflammed or not
They are also attempting to get blood from a vein (i told Sara to try the hands because thats where they usually get it)
They have taken more blood from the picc...
His fever all day today was 96 to 98 so that is good... antibiotics might be working
Chris had no poop all day.. so when i left tonight at 7-ish, it had been almost 24 hours
Not sure if i should get excited because i dont know if a gall bladder infection would stop poop... i think since the stomach is connected to the intestines and whatnot that he would still poop if he has inflammation in the bowels.. but i am not a doctor, obviously... just trying to see some bright side...
anyways, his blood pressure was good all day.. they have him on dopamine.. but its still good that they had him stablized ...
So, there went our little bone marrow unit, 4th floor, JennChris party for the superbowl... postponed! :(
I am happy he was not on ativan.. but he slept... but if all that is going on in his belly, his body needs to rest...
I decided to leave .. actually i think i left at 630... i watched Faith hill and jennifer Hudson and left shortly after. they kick you out of ICU at 7pm for an hour (shift change) and figured since he was sleeping, and i wanted to get rest and watch the game, that i would just go home.. I will stop there in the morning before work
I asked Dr Hart (Infectious Disease doctor who i have known since june whenever chris had infections) about what they would do and he doesnt think surgery would be an option now... and the xray shows no punctures or holes... so they could put a tube to gallbladder to drain the crap out that is infected..
But who knows yet... it could be just meds.. or something else
Chris would open his eyes and smile when i talked and answer when i asked him stuff.. but he wants to sleep.. he is pretty miserable but smiled and agreed when i told him to hang in there...
He said something about still fighting "for us" - poor guy has been through hell.. and back... and back to hell...
Its amazing how fast this happened... He asked me on friday night to bring his laptop on saturday and when i got there satutrday he already had a 102.3 fever
Dr Hart talked to me about what i already figured, but i wanted clarification... he provides the antibiotics orders and management and he hopes to be given as best an immune system as possible.. but with his kind of GVHD, the oncologists do not want to stop the immunosuppresents so we just hope that the meds work with his suppresed immune system
He got platelets and red blood today. His white cell count was a little higher than yesterday.. it was 2.9... 4-10 is normal. Under 2 is neutropenic..
Dr Aisner is on for February.. I asked him that today... so atleast there will be someone there i like for a while.. i was worried about who february might be
When i got to ICU today, i ran into a resident i know from november or october and she is in ICU now... she is so sweet and chats whenever i see her.. i think she liked me and chris... makes me feel more comfy when i can talk to doctors i have gotten to know
i am not happy that the steelers won.. but i am more sad that chris missed yet another "holiday" - it was a good game though
Well, its Feb 1st.. 2 full months since he was admitted for transplant...
He has been in the hospital for about 95 of the last 104 days or so
I never imagined he would still be in the hospital or going back to ICU this far into transplant... But I trust God will get us thru this additional ICU trip & infection...
Please keep him in your prayers
i will update more tomorrow
xoxox Jenn
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